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Soccer Thorns

Crystal Dunn? Crystal Dunn.

Oh my god, it’s happening. Everybody stay calm. Stay f***ing calm!

Unless you’ve had your head under a rock for the last six hours, you’ve likely heard the news: Crystal Dunn is a Thorn.

It’s not poppycock this time—thanks to OL Reign taking one for the team(s) and “facilitating” the trade. The 2019 World Cup Champion, two-time NWSL Champion, NWSL golden boot winner and MVP of the 2015 season’s move to Portland (finally) extends beyond the offseason.

In exchange, the Thorns sent the Reign $150,000, a 2021 international slot, and Portland’s natural first-round pick in the 2022 college draft. Here are a few of our takeaways about the big news:

[incoherent screaming]

With multiple expansion drafts on the horizon and no clear answer to whether soccer in the traditional sense will even be possible in 2021, the Thorns’ future—like that of many teams in this league—is uncertain (more on that in a minute). What looks pretty watertight at this juncture is that Portland’s midfield is going to involve all of Lindsey Horan, Crystal Dunn, and Christine Sinclair.

Those players aren’t going anywhere, which is, uh, crazy? It feels like cheating. Then again, when Dunn went to North Carolina, that also felt like cheating—so maybe what it boils down to is that having Crystal Dunn is cheating.

Dunn is one of the few players in the world who can genuinely bend a game to her will. She can score practically at will and is equally dangerous at both dribbling and passing. She’s a defensive threat, too. It’s hard to overstate how huge an acquisition she is for the Thorns, especially when you start to think about her connecting with oh, say, Sophia Smith.

What does this mean for the expansion draft?

This looks like a superteam for now, but not so fast. Three expansion drafts are looming in the next two years, with one—for Racing Louisville—happening in less than a month. Don’t expect this to be the last move Portland makes this offseason.

Assuming the rules are the same as they were in 2015, the Thorns will be able to protect nine players, including two USWNT-subsidized players. As things stand, the two protected subsidized players have to be Dunn and Horan. We’d already expected them to lose at least one keeper, likely AD Franch, but now she, Heath, and Sauerbrunn will all be on the chopping block. (Sophia Smith is blissfully saved by the fact that USWNT allocations won’t be announced until after the expansion draft.) Sauerbrunn probably doesn’t get taken—she’s 35 and has made it clear she wants to settle down in Portland. We think she tells any interested team she’ll retire rather than report.

Photo by Nikita Taparia

Heath? Harder to say. She also owns a home here and clearly likes playing for the Thorns. She also holds the same leverage as any elite player in this league: she can always decide to extend her time in Manchester rather than move to Louisville or Sacramento. However: it’s not hard to imagine, say, Louisville picking up her rights, her deciding to stay in England for 2021, and then forcing a trade to LA for 2022.

Of course, that’s assuming the Thorns can scam them into taking the rights of someone who probably doesn’t plan on playing for them, but the Thorns have a pretty solid track record when it comes to taking advantage of other teams (see: The Alex Morgan Trade). That’s also assuming Angel City wants Heath on their side, but it’s hard to imagine a team saying no to her if she asks.

The No. 10 problem, solved

We’ve all been dreading/denying the inevitable: that one day, sure as the cruel sea beats cliffs into sand, Christine Sinclair will have to retire. That she’s had an almost unbelievably long and consistent career doesn’t change how problematic this is for the Thorns in the long term.

A situation that we think epitomizes this pretty well was last year, when the Thorns tried three different players at the No. 10 while Sinclair was away for the World Cup. Dagný Brynjarsdóttir, Ana Crnogorčević, and Andressinha—may she be free forevermore—are all good players, but the team’s reliance on an all-time great in that position showed in her absence.

Dunn is the answer to that, positionally at least. As far as Sinclair’s importance to the locker room, there’s of course no real replacement, but Mark Parsons seems to think Dunn has some of the same qualities as a leader, too. “She has such a contagious energy about her that just wants to make you be better when you’re around her,” he said in an interview released by the team today. “But what she doesn’t get praise enough for is her leadership, and the way that she leads. By example, and by being positive, and by being driven. She’s had a lot of success, and it’s not by luck.”

By Katelyn Best

Katelyn Best writes about the Thorns and the NWSL, among other things. She is the reigning taco champion of the North American women’s soccer circuit.